Hesitant Hedonism

As we all come to realize, life is full of surprises and there are no guarantees, but one thing is certain: A life lived without pleasure, beauty and a sensible degree of self-indulgence is a sad and wasted one. Despite the gibbering of religious activists, over-amped life coaches and cynical psychologists, isn't it okay to have some good times during our brief moment here on earth? Who was it that said, "This is no dress rehearsal, you know. This is it." I've always found some kind of solace in that maxim that was worth remembering.

To wit, Jesse, age forty-one. He reached the high point of his career as a software salesman for Tower Gaming five years ago. Since then life has only been challenging and gut-retching for that's when his wife, and the mother of their young daughter Sarah Kay, died of leukemia. The untimely death could not have been more damaging to their little family. Sarah Kay, now eighteen, shared the family home in Berkeley until after her mother's death when she began acting-out, first by endlessly running away from home and reckless experimenting with drugs. But in due course it was her numerous shenanigans with shop-lifting and petty theft that got her sentenced to a long-run in a state operated, residential treatment center for girls.

Neither could stop crying with sadness and guilt on the day that Jesse assisted Sarah Kay with the packing of her bags and was to deliver her to the treatment center at 6 o'clock in the morning. It was then that he became her hero again for the first time since she was in elementary school. You see, instead of heading for the treatment center, he drove directly to the airport and put his troubled thirteen year old on a plane for Switzerland that had been prearranged by his over-paid attorney. And so for the next five years she lived and worked, quite earnestly I might add, at a strictly run Benedictine convent/hospital high in the Alps. For his blatant contempt-of-court, Jesse was sentenced to six-months in jail and was happy to accept the guilt for his daughter's sins. Only Jesse's unscrupulous attorney benefited from their time apart. Today, as a hard working, dependable software salesman again, Jesse manages to present a happy, though inauthentic, face to the world around him. However, beneath his thin, jovial facade is very cheerless and miserable man.

But eureka - as this story begins both father and daughter are euphoric in anticipation of their upcoming reunion. She is no longer considered a minor by the state of California and can return home. Both pray for change in their lives for during their time apart both denied themselves any pleasure at all.

Copyright 2010 G. Leo Maselli

A Rare Tiger Day

WRITER'S NOTE:
This weekly blog is a fictional account of a 10-week long, so-called, Success Team as they flex their capitalistic muscles and learn to fly again. The story is about an enterprising group of three unemployed professionals and two struggling entrepreneurs all keen on major advancements in their chosen fields. They organize their enterprise as The Tiger Team. This blog will describe how the team was founded and fostered by the people who would come to benefit from it the most. It is about the emotional stakes for those participating, and the occasionally brilliant and ofter humorous ways they cope. Above all else these stories will be about reinvention, full of wonderful characters, provocative endings and non-tragic themes.

A warm and sunny morning catches us by surprise. As we arrive at the attorney's home on the island, he and his housekeeper are frantically moving the meeting outside to his formal garden. We all lend a hand. First thing you know we're toasting our hard work with mimosas (with just a dash of grenadine, we're told, to enhance the presentation). Toasted English muffins, marmalade, and sausages prevent us from getting noticeably tipsy. A nearby hammock did call to me as the meeting progressed, but being a trained professional, I resisted. This comes up a lot in my life.

First item on the agenda is whether or not the team will re-commit to another ten-weeks. Our original agreement, initialed by each member at our second meeting, stated that we would meet for a fixed period of consecutive weekly sessions and then just walk away the better for it. Completions are valuable, fixed targets are good and finite is just fine. Therefore, today is our last time together - unless we plan to get together socially or perhaps volunteering ourselves to a worthy cause as has been suggested. A discussion followed by a show of hands reveals, to my surprise, that we unanimously want to continue on with another ten-weeks meeting schedule.

Of course, the corporate VP will need to be replaced as soon as possible. He's off, with our fond good wishes, to Florida for two-weeks and then on to South America to set up the circus's tour that opens in all the capital cities in just twelve-months. Everyone else on the current Tiger Team is eager to get started anew with high intentions and purpose.

The attorney announces that he's picking up his Yellow Lab puppy in just one week and could not be happier. His other news is that his new law partners are encouraging him to run for public office in Sacramento. He admits he loved the power attained in the past as an elected official. We assure him our votes if he remains humble. Not much chance of that. The publisher and the entrepreneur speak of the value that the success team has provided them in terms of moral support, accountability, coaching, plan structuring and execution. After a one-week break we will be right back at it.

As for me and the Success Team Blog, my commitment was for ten-weeks and I've crossed the finishing line. I've enjoyed writing it and yet I feel quite excited to move on. For the writer as with the lover, the best aphrodisiac is a new area of interested. Oui? What has caught my attention is the challenging subject of mastering the lost art of leisure and pleasure. Statistically we Americans work harder and longer and more stressful hours than anyone in the world today. I do not hide the fact that I question that life style. The new blog will explore hedonism and my point of view that it means, not excess and a slippery downward spiral, but a lifestyle of enlightenment and enjoyment.

I trust that you will all continue to follow my work. Thank you so very much for your time.

Tiger On Your Tail

This morning the Tiger Team met at the home of the writer at its regular start time of 9 o'clock. No freshly baked cinnamon rolls today. No, no. Too plebeian we're advised. Instead we are treated to Chinese dim sum and jasmine tea. Lovely and delicious. The attorney bemoans not having access to strong, black coffee for the first time since he was twelve, but relents. As the munching begins the writer/facilitator puts the team on notice that we have but one more meeting scheduled and suggests we each consider whether or not to extend our ten-week agreement. By next meeting each individual member is required to go on record about continuing, adding or replacing one or more current members, and to delineate a new individual game plan. We are Tiger Team, after all, and our operating principal is to establish a clear goal and to attack it with the intent to achieve it by our final session.

The business man is ready to go and expresses that, after careful research and consideration, his conclusion is that because his lotion products and skin treatments are best sold with the help of live demonstrations, his distribution plan will have to include some way of conducting these demonstrations. He asks us to consider thinking outside the box and to listen to his MLM (multilevel network marketing) plans. We discuss the often negative things that are said about MLMs as well as the hard work that is apparently required to succeed. Ultimately we unanimously agree that because of his savvy (and beautiful) wife and business partner, and because of their shared enthusiasm, he has an excellent chance to succeed. We get samples of his lotions. By the end of the meeting I am smelling quite a bit like coconut.

The stymied publisher admits little or no progress with her plans to become an eBook publisher - simply calling it inertia. A familiar state (evidently) and one she's just willing to be in. We remind her that the best cure of inertia and/or procrastination is a big brother or a drill sergeant or a guy with a whip and a chair - or a Tiger Team on your tail. It's depressing and yet at the same time fascinating to hear of other opportunities she feels she's missed in her life. Why the inclination now to just watch another chance go by is beyond us - but we convince her that the knowing of why may just be the booby-prize. We suggest that she just transcend the knowing and get to work.

Next week the final meeting is back on the island. Champagne and orange juice is requested by the writer (me). It is so moved and seconded. I stroll with the publisher out to her car. She smells deliciously like Tahitian vanilla. There seems to be a mutual attraction going on here. Is it pheromones or is it the tropical lotions? It remains best unspoken. But I digress.

Tigers Are Back

Last week's blog described a meeting at Peets with but three members: the writer, the corporate VP and the attorney/politician. Here below is describe a lunch shared by the remaining two members that same afternoon.

They meet for lunch on a census-work-day for both. The publisher is done at noon. The entrepreneur (wearing a beret) is due to report at 1:30 in the same area. Down near AT&T Park there is a very famous greasy spoon breakfast joint. It's sunny so they order and take a seat outside on the tarmac and wait to be served. It's warm and a chilled beer would be refreshing, I'm sure. Reports that filtered in say that, in fact, they had ice tea. The business man tells how they made him a Crew Chief as soon as he walked in the door down at the U.S. Census office. After two days of training, he was assigned a small team and managed to get them functioning quickly. He's a natural leader - a tough love kind of guy. Unfortunately he made a female enumerator angry and she reported him. The female in questions disappeared, but he's still enjoying the work - however now he's just a regular grunt with a bag over his shoulder. He does open up about his business enterprise as never before. He reports that he is broke but does own, free and clear, a warehouse full of organic lotions that he designed, formulated and contracted to have bottled. He boasts that his lotions are totally green, natural and sustainable, inside and out. Sales efforts are just getting underway and he must make a decision quickly regarding distribution models very soon. The publisher is ramping up too. ""Initially I'll be publishing hands-on learning guides on monetization and creation of interactive courses." She describes it as "targeting".

And now, this week's meeting. It is held at the home of the entrepreneur. It's been two weeks since we five have surrounded the same coffee table. We get right into it. First, we must assure the host that he is harmless, a sweet man and that he should continue to be just his usual, authentic self. I warn him that there will always be ladies who don't like him. So what? After bringing the rest of the team up to speed on his lotions enterprise, the ball is passed to the corporate VP. He uses his whole 15-minutes describing his childhood dream of joining the Ringling Brothers Circus. He reports to that in three weeks he'll be leaving for Orlando, his new home. He is the International Tour Manager. That is one week after Tiger Team is set to breakup after completing the ten consecutive meetings we signed up for. The writer can only wring his hands and describe all the work on his plate currently: two blogs generating no direct income, getting a completed script to the agent that requested it (with the promise of income), working with a paying client to adapt his story to screenplay format, and two screenwriting grants to prepare for. Nothing but white-water ahead. The publisher passes out her business plan summary to be commented on next week. The attorney/politician speaks of his dog ownership research. Will he or won't he? The dog drama builds.

Between Time

The stymied publisher and the entrepreneur are absent today's meeting. They got a call from the U.S. Census and as we speak are reluctantly sitting in a training class at $22/hour. Better than a hockey puck in the ear, I suppose. Thus only three of us are available to carry the Tiger Team ball, the corporate VP, the attorney/politico and myself. We decided a field trip is the way to go. We assemble precisely at 9am at a Peet's at the corner of Fillmore and Sacramento. It's apparent that we are authentically happy to see one-another. Tis old friends we've become.

As the struggling artist in the group, I report my dismay at find no short-term gigs to fill-in the gaps created by a less than regular cash flow. The U.S. Census folks never called. The Whole Earth Expo folks did not get back to me. Plus another eight bios or resumes or writing samples that went out generated no activity, i.e. interviews. What I did accomplish during the last week was to make measurable progress with my marketing plans designed to flaunt my services as a business communications specialist. My new Website for BC&C launches on May 27th. What are my goals for this upcoming week? I've got to get the requested 101-page script for Olives for Camille printed and mailed to the literary agent asap. Also, I have six days to write the outline for the first act of Between Time for my retainer, the ex-punk rocker. And so, I will go into a state of solitude for the next 6-days. Each Tiger Team member makes a note to watch and see how much can create in a week. I'm eager to see myself pull this one off too.

The corporate VP speaks of enthusiastically about the best experience of his week: three mock interviews at the JVS (Jewish Vocational Center). He's flying to Florida for interviews in two weeks and these mock interview sessions will allow him to practice his skills with a volunteer professional - and at no cost. Yes, Ringling Brothers is interested. Joining the circus - I'm so jealous.

The attorney/politico is pleased just to arrive on time at this morning's meeting. Seems he's been running late all week. He accomplished his first week of socializing with his new eight, law partners to-be. Big changes are headed for this man's life. He admits he's nervous and would not want to take all this on without the Tiger Team as support. When the meeting is over we head for the Pet Hospital/Kennel/Adoption Center. Unfortunately, the center doesn't open for another hour. So as it turns out, he is on his own. We are all on our own.

If Dog is the Answer, What is the Question?

The weather is cold. The sky is sapphire. The sunrise is brilliant. From my vantage point on this little island in the middle of the Bay, the great ships of maritime commerce move slowly about in every direction.

Being ten minutes late, I'm the last to arrive at the home of today's host and facilitator, the attorney/politician. The door is answered by the elderly Asian woman. With a respectful bow and a bright smile, she indicates I should follow her up the grand staircase. The entire ground floor and broad staircase remain as they were a month ago: devoid of furniture and the like. When we reach the second floor things change. On thick Persian rugs, we move silently past remarkable antique, Western European furniture and stunning Expressionist Art into a spacious, high-tech conference room/office. That's when I begin to feel as though I'm in a Bond film. There, standing in the sun that pours through a skylight. sipping their coffee, is the Tiger Team waiting for my arrival. I called ahead, of course. With a quick exchange of greetings, the host suggests we begin at once, given that we will be ending precisely at our usual time. As we take our seats, fresh coffee and croissants are made ave available.

The attorney/politician requests the floor. He dramatically leans forward in his chair. "I have a personal question. I'm a little embarrassed. How do you all get up early and ready to go each and every morning? I've failed at it miserably all my life. Lately I can't even come up with a good reason why to get up at all." We discuss access to alarm clocks, both high and low tech, and the importance of placement of the devices in the room. But it's the businessman who offers, "Well, I just have two dogs, and they have always set my days in motion bright and early." The entire Tiger Team looks at one another. It's the corporate VP who shouts out, "Get a dog!" The attorney grins like a kid getting his first puppy, "I've always wanted a dog." The entire process took less than five minutes and it's changing his life. That's why Success Teams work. The chance of paradigm-shift is always in the wings.

The publisher is on the edge of her chair. "Imagine this," she says. " A girl of thirteen sits on the floor in the corner of her bedroom, amid all the clutter, to begin her homework. She opens an electronic book. Her fingers move across the bottom and the pages turn and she begins to read. She does not know all of the words, but with a light touch of the screen she sees the definition and, if she so desires, hears the correct pronunciation. She reads on and when she gets tired, the book will help her sound out the words or even read the whole story to her - or tell it to her with moving pictures. I didn't discover this new world, but that's where I'm headed: online publishing."

The Tiger Team is rockin'. Next week, two of our members will be absent. And so there will be a field trip - our first. The corporate VP and I are taking the attorney out to find a dog. He hasn't signed off on this idea yet. But he will, don't you agree? Martinis at the Top of the Mark might be an inducement if one is required.

Half-Time in the Locker Room

After the fresh baked cinnamon rolls and Italian roast coffee are served, the meeting begins. As today's facilitator, I suggested that, given we have reached the half-way mark of our enterprise, it's a traditional time for each of us to pause and speak of our degree of success during the prior first-half of "the game," as well as our game plan during the second half. As with all games the goal is to win. What does that mean to each of us?

The former corporate vice-president reports that as he was trudging through the dark in Golden Gate Park looking for the homeless for the U.S. Census, enduring the drenching rain and his own terror of ill-tempered pit bulls, he had an epiphany. He's decided that his Degree in Business Administration could be better used with his seldom spoken about desire to join the Ringling Brothers Circus. Yes, he can juggle flaming objects, but that's not the goal. He wants to be Ringling's international tour manager. That is his fresh aspiration. Now that's news. Let the second half begin.

The publisher has installed her new computer, arranged her new filing system during one sleepless week and is now ready to investigate the new world of publishing with the advent of Google's I-Pad and the public's apparent turning away from ink print on paper. Let the second half begin. (How I long for the old days)

The business man (with the good ideas) informs us that his wife of 22-years is annoyed with his constant goal setting, i.e. daily goals, weekly goals, monthly goals, and calendar year goals. He believes that becoming rich would have been more rewarding if he had planned it, rather than just awakened each day with a new set of fires to put out and launches to perform. Nowadays, he claims to set only performance goals each day, not outcome goals. "You should take care to set goals over which you have as much control as possible. There is nothing more dispiriting than failing to achieve a personal goal for reasons beyond your control. In business, these could be bad business environments or unexpected effects of government policy."

It seems to me that, with my half-time sports analogy, these reasons could include poor refereeing, bad weather, injury, or just plain bad luck. I agree. If you base your goals on personal performance, then you can keep control over the achievement of your goals and draw satisfaction from them. Even if your significant-other thinks you're over the top.

Next week - back to Buena Vista Island.